Monday night was the Big Dance!
March Madness comes to a head with two teams, but the journey truly began for each player many years ago. The interesting thing, we often focus on the winning aspects of the game, the calls made or missed, the hustle up and down the court, and forget that losing and losing graciously is just as important.
The anticipation of the final two teams (Texas Tech and Virginia State) is built with each background story of the players, their families, and coaches. Needless to say, these young men and their coaches are all leaders and with that can comes a heavy load. While you may not be leading on the court, I am excited to share three steps to lifting the heavy load as leaders.
As many know, I primarily work with women leaders and one of the things that I’ve noticed, in conversations with them, especially if they are looking to “go to the next level” or “to level up” and take their seat at the table, is a theme from one of the 7 Pitfalls of Women Leaders. Rowing, also known as proving one’s worth or overcompensating, happens when working extensive hours, taking on additional projects, leading new teams (and not enough time), coupled with the hurry up and rush home and to begin a second job. Regardless of the leader, if that’s the second office of wife or second office of mom, maybe both– most women seem to be trying to figure out, “How can I do a better job of work-life balance?”
If you are curious– here is a shortcut to what effective work-life balance looks like. Examine your circle and find someone who exemplifies the type of work-life balance that you are going for. That’s the person you want to connect with! That’s the one you want to try to emulate to follow. And how will it work? Well, it won’t. Because the real shortcut is realizing that Work-Life Balance does not exist. It does not exist!
Anna Quindlen says, “If your success is not on your own terms if it looks good to the world, but does not feel good in your heart, it is not success at all.”
To start lifting the heavy load, consider one of these three steps:
Shift the belief from work-life balance to work-life effectiveness. By changing your belief you are giving yourself permission to drop the ball. There will be some days where you simply will not get it all done– at home or at work and that needs to be ok.
No one thinks of the runner up as a high achievement, but I beg to differ. It took just as much hard work to arrive to the game. Define success in all categories of your life. Be encouraged to think of all areas of your life– and remember that your areas, the assets of your life, may not be the same as someone else. And to that end, your definition of success, for those categories in your life, is personal. Do not allow someone else to put their definition of success on you! You MUST determine that for yourself.
Think Ms. Jackson. You may remember her big breakout album, right? Control is the key to the heavy lift. Stress comes when we feel out of control. And unfortunately, most times we feel out of control because of the stress that’s happening. Now the big thing that I remember about the control album, and why it was such a breakout album for Janet, is she talks about how it was her time and her proclamation to the world that she was taking control of her own life, decisions, career, and destiny.
It all begins with a choice! If you are looking for more ways to effectively create work-life effectiveness moments, we can walk through this process together. Start here and let’s chat.